The Good Wife

Wake up in the morning; drowsily pick up phone and WHAT?! 8 messages??

Rubbing eyes opens the messages.....

T234509 is interested in your profile say yes to communicate further!

Hi, I sent you a personalized message

Hi Bharathi , T879578 may be interested in you as he visited your Profile. Take the next step and Connect with him!
                                                Blah blah blah.....

Putting phone down and I go about my normal day.

From past few days my phone is being fed with these kinds of messages as I have crossed the threshold age of an Indian woman. My parents, friends, relatives and well-wishers are trying to marry me off. I am spending more time on these matrimonial sites than on face book and twitter. And the result is exchanging mails, horoscopes and latest pictures.

The important thing in woman’s life is ‘Marriage’ and in our society marriage give the status of “Complete Woman” .Wherever I go someone or the other keep preaching me how essential marriage is for a happy, secure and stable life. I understand that and I am not against marriage.#To the people who think I don't understand

I keep reading the profiles of prospective grooms and their partner preferences. Many out there write looking for “Good Wife”. The point that I never understand  is how they define “Good Wife”. is it based on her beauty, education, hobbies, salary, family background etc etc?

Most of the grooms and their parents have predetermined parameters such as level of education and salary range, body type, skin color, height, weight etc that they expect the girl to fit into. 

Recently I sent an interest to one person whose parameters matched with mine. And his partner preference column is filled with “looking for Good Wife”. I thought I can be good wife and so I proceeded further. But sadly, he rejected my interest and said he is looking for a good wife who earns same  as him, should be jovial blah blah..... blah.

I laughed at that mail, how someone can judge a person as a good wife by looking at their profile which merely gives a picture and statistics? And the scary part is does girl’s salary is so important? Are the girls with less salary are unappealing?

Since then I was trying to find the definition of Good Wife and ended up writing this post.

Marriage according to me is a conscious decision to spend your life with someone who is compatible and you enjoy being around with them for the rest of your life. What does it have to do with a woman’s salary or any other variable that change over time? 

Finally, I want to say that the imaginary scenes we play in our heads are not realistic. Being good or bad depends on both man and woman. To have a good wife, you have to be able to communicate efficiently, be your partner’s best friend and maintain your own identity by respecting her thoughts & actions.

Perfect Good wife is not born; she has to be made out of your actions. So!! Dear Men,come out of the MYTH.

P.S: This is not my frustration, it is just a sharing... and a Question to find out the definition of Good wife 

Break free

These days my life is on roller-coaster and I was taking important life decisions, at one point I questioned myself "What could be my life if I had absolutely no limits and what I would choose?" I felt I was stuck in life for various reasons, but I was not the reason behind it, but it was the belief system I have.

Every one of us has formed a belief system and we believe that we can’t break free from that and then get stuck in life many times. I felt I am addicted to that belief system and I can't break free from it, no matter how hard I try.

After long analysis I decided that it is always good to let go off thinking that no longer applies to my life and I changed it. The  mantras of my  new belief system are:

• I don’t have to be perfect.
• I am not placed here to please everyone.
• I can pursue my dreams without fear.
• I don’t have to stay in a job which I don’t like.
• I don’t have to spend time with people who aren't healthy for me.
• Stop bothering about what people talk about me

And..."Break free!!" Love yourself, Be nice to you, pamper yourself, take care of yourself. 

 

P.S: The post is boring, but I want to write  the flow of my thoughts and the things I wish to let go off :) Thanks for reading

Black is BOLD

Black symbolizes power, mystery, strength, authority and elegance. It’s a colour that gives a sense of independence and a strong will.Black is a colour that is used in every walk of our life be it technology, house furnishings, kitchenware, stationary. We all wrote our first letters on a black slate. For hue variation of any colour, black is require.

My mother always says to carry something black or put a dot with kohl on sole when I travel as it absorbs negative energy and protect me from any harm happening.

Psychology state that “people who like black may be conventional, conservative and serious or they may think of themselves as being sophisticated or very dignified”, I am not sure of these things. But black makes me look classic, comforts my eye and I feel I own that color.

So now coming to 5 Black things I love to own

1. Black Tattoo

Yes I want to ink my skin in black. I feel that is the one which stays with me permanently even when my hair becomes grey, my tooth fall off and when life fades away. It shows a significant aspect of my life. It would be my bold decision forever.

 2. Black Mac Book Air

Yes Mac Book!!!  Apple has created its revolution in the field of technology, I would be proud to own a Mac Book Air, not that the regular kind. But a BLACK Mac, which flaunts  white Apple logo on it. Having 10 years of relationship with windows and using all the versions of OS ,I want to try Mac OS. And it is obviously a classy gadget :)

3. Black Kohl

They say "Eyes are the windows to the soul and that if you look deep within you can see the persons sincerity and truth". We learn to associate identity of the world with our eyes, eyes are more important in communicating with other people, sometimes we convey big things through our eyes. I am very thankful to my eyes which show me this beautiful world and so I love to show them beautifully to this world. I like to enhance my eyes by applying kohl. Eyes look so damn pretty with Kohl.

4. A Black Cross Pen 

"The Pen is mightier than a sword".

I have a habit of writing down personal dairy about my day-to-day events, I believe that when I write down all these things and they become my story. I use black pen and would love to own a Black coloured Pen from Cross Brand which is America's oldest manufacturer of fine writing instruments.

 5. Black dress

Last but not least, I desire to own a perfect black formal wear,because it looks Classy, Elegant and Fabulous.Black brings Elegant look , after all Elegance is the only beauty that never fades.

This is my list of 5 black things I desire for..



This post is part of #WhatTheBlack activity at Blogadda.com

Image source: All images are found through google search

Being Unfair

On weekends, one should get lucky to get a vacant trail room as soon as you want to try a dress. On such a busy Sunday, I was waiting for my turn to try a dress. There I found this girl who almost picked up many clothes to try accompanied by her mom. Whatever she wears her mom says only one thing "ee colour suit avvadu ra nee colour ki konchem vere colour try cheyi"  (color doesn’t suit on you, may be you have to try another one) and the girl kept on saying "konchem tellaga undalisindi amma nenu" (I should have been a bit fair ).

Crap!! Every dress she wore was just looking perfect on her. The girl was really pretty with proper body curves and above all she had a very beautiful smile.

I am also a dusky skinned girl woman. Whenever I visit any beauty parlour, first thing they tell me is my skin is so tanned and I should try anti-tan pack, I always tell them, “that is my original skin colour” and lord sun has not played any role in it. I have been advised by many people to go for chemical peels, fairness facials, many home remedies to make myself look a bit fair. During my marriage looks, few guys who are darker than me too judged me as “she is dark”.

I don’t understand why people or parents make a person so conscious and insecure about their color. Being dark or dusky is not a sin. Added to all of it, TV channels, they all are flooded with fairness cream advertisements, and they teach that if you are not fair, you won’t be getting enough opportunities and you won’t be successful in life. Instead of building confidence in a person, media is teaching obsession to young girls and making them less confident.

I understand , this obsession is in our blood and takes time to realize the truth but how far is it right to put down a person for the darkness of their skin??

I strongly believe that skin colour doesn’t determine your worth as a person. You look best when you are comfortable in your skin. Just maintain a clean and clear skin, that’s perfect!
Don’t allow anyone to make you feel inferior because of your skin colour. 

You are created by god with loads of love, you are not his flaw you are his favourite. Just Love yourself…

I love being unfair, do you??

Life doesn't have to be perfect!!

Disclaimer: This is not an interesting post, it is just a scribble; No gyan is guaranteed after reading the post. If you wish to kill some time, please go ahead 

Just wondering how many times we might have run behind something which we think is everything. There are many things in life, you want them, but you can never get them. For some things you have substitutes but for some you can’t. Even substitutes may make you feel BETTER but not the SAME.

Sometimes you meet someone and you know it is not going to be a perfect relation; you get into a job which is not perfect for you, at times you dress imperfect etc... There could be many things which are incompatible to you. But for some odd reason you want to give it a try for hell of it.

From a year, my life was not going in the way I imagined; I plan something and some other thing gets implemented. All through mixed emotions overruled me; I just sit and wonder how??What?? Why? All I know is new life waits for me but I am stuck, something is resisting me and holding me back. One day I broke the stillness; it was ME who was holding everything.

It may sound strange, but I was the one, who is not able to appreciate what’s in front of me, I realized it’s more important to measure good things what you actually have in your life. Just count your blessings is the mantra to be happy. 

When we fail, we get disappointed but we are going learn and they make us confident and strong. That’s how an individual grows and evolves. So at the end that is what matters most.

Now I realize about being perfect, may or may not exist. I think imperfect is the one for me, just like the imperfection in us. Its okay life doesn’t have to be perfect, it just have to be lived.

I have accepted that happiness is not in being perfect, Happiness is not about having what you want but wanting what you have.

we all feel screwed up sometimes, but that's okay.Be happy and enjoy each and every moment in life, Never have regrets, everything happens for a reason. Don’t hold on grudges, karma will take care.

Be loyal and committed in relationships, don’t let the insecurities and ego ruin whole of it. Never leave your passion; at the end it brings you recognition.

Importantly, Age is for your body, it’s not for your heart and mind.. So never worry that your are getting old.

P.S : This post is written from mobile, bear with any typos

P.S.S.: I took break from work, it is so awesome to have time for myself 

No Name Post..

I hear many times girls & boys having 5, 6, 7 breakups. I wonder how someone can fall in love many times. Though  people say it is quite possible.

But what I feel is none of them are seriously in the relationship that was more of time pass  than a serious one. Those are not the love stories; trust me they are just "Lust Stories". Well, they could be stories made out of necessity.

The meaning of the Love is slowly fading away, the three words used to generate chills in one’s body, but now they just roll from the lips just like that. Walking hand in hand, candle light dinners, love letters... seems to be a stupid ways. Now a days everything is replaced by wild sex acts involving  love making in deserted places or in the cars.

Relationships are made just like that; someone is madly in love with a girl/boy met in a party, they drink and roam around. Many people just hook around with their buddies with few drinks. And they blame the drink for getting them hooked.

I feel pathetic that emotions have become so cheap and valueless. How long one keep going around like this? What if one day you wake up and feel that u need a shoulder to lean, hold your hand, and listen to your problems. Hug you and say everything is going to be fine. What if when you want someone to share your joys, care for you, pat your shoulder for your success, and be with u for celebrations?

Think a moment!!! Can you say I Love You truly to someone who means a lot to you?

These relationships last till Lust exists, so look for someone who has godly love in u, who makes you feel that he/she belongs to you and enjoy the eternal feeling of love.

Let’s not “LOVE- a Divine Madness” bite us back.

Cherish the sweet thing in right way and have happy life.


P.s:It is my own view, i don't want to offend any one , i further  understand it is democratic country and everyone are free to live their life in the way they want.

She knows...He will...

It was 2AM, Sirisha was thirsty,opened her eyes and heard a knock of the door, She got up ,opened, and confirmed it was wind. She got back to her position on bed and saw Sanju moving uncomfortably, his blanket  isn't covering him at all.She patted him and covered him with blanket

Few seconds later, she heard a familiar sound, and sensed warmth near her ears that was Sanju, She could smell him she just turned, and placed his head on her chest, Sanju  put his hands around her. Looking at Sanju, Sirisha  sensed that his world is perfect now. They kissed each other and again he closed his eyes….

She knows, he will sleep well now…:)

P.S :Sleeping next to someone you love makes falling asleep easier, reduces depression risk and helps you live longer.